Hello girls, guys and everyone who listens , I have had now control over my life ever I went into marriage from my parents rule to a husband who controlled my life to a divorce and in a relationship that is the most controlled of all.

You have to take charge and control your own destiny and thru all  things children work and Blessings from Jesus I still have this controlling person in my life.  It is so hard to get them out and maybe if they would just be loving and supportive of work and my family it would be fine.  But everything has to be his way he even tries to control my coming and goings.  And accuses me of things I would never think of doing, If I have to have someone watch my every move than I need a knew move in my life.  I am true and always where I say I am but I could be at the store and he’s calling every minute where are you when are you coming home.  Everyone out there this is a person who is insecure with his own being so blaming me for not for everything helps his ego.  I am too old for this I have alittle time left on earth I would love peace and  harmony not confusion on a constant basis. So if you are with a controlling person think about it is it really worth your sanity is this healthy for you and your family to have this person stay around in your life.  We have one life here and we are to make the best of it and with all thanks to Jesus he will Bless us and he will be your strength to get out of this relationship.  I really conclude to you to get as far away from this person as possible before it becomes out of control and something bad happens.  Remember your special and you deserve much more so go and seek it.   Bless you

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Well girls my day started with the call to the Air company as my upstairs unit just simply quit. In this !00 to 117 degrees weather for the past 2 months or longer its put all our cooling units through the test. Well it failed it tried but it just wore it out to my unfortunate luck. You might say why did your Jesus let this happen to you. My Jesus did not let this happen this is what happens to us on our earthly life and he can make blessings come to off set the money I am out of in the future by blessing me with more catering or painting on canvas or my cook book taking off the shelves and selling like crazy that would by what blessings my Jesus does. He never causes our discomforts pain or problems those are usually our doing or just cant be helped as this one was.
After about an hour the worker let me know he could get it going again and fix the problem and add freon for just 500.00. Well if I was not a single parent person whatever my reaction in this position was o Dear Jesus another hurdle and what ever blessings in work or anything you can send my way to cover another surprise not needed bill. And I know you all have something similar to this that happens and you just can’t think how you can pay another unexspected bill.
And after i wrapped around that on Monday I stopped at my mail box as I unlocked it never knew more news was awaiting to make my day even more a bad monday.
My Daughter who graduated from Ole Miss who continues to travel from state to state to work on farms to learn natural food growing herbs,flowers,grains,corn etc. has been everywhere and on one of her learning journeys she was in California and was on her way back so she could be back south for her Best Friends Wedding and as she drove through the little towns of California found herself on a one way street so she tried to make it right when she realized it and turned around to get off that street. Well a lovely policeman watched her and then gave her a ticket for going down a one way street. Even with her plea of sir I am not from here just passing tru and did not know this was a one way street until she was turned on it. Did not see a sign. So when she was here I gave her the mail in it was a notice of a court date. I ask her what it was she told me the story and said she was going to call that court clerk and see if she could do a drivers class on line or take care of it. Remember we are the parents it does not matter how old they are they know it all we are simply not heard just a whisper in her ear that floats right out the other and never thought of again.
My last words to her as she left a week ago did you take care of your ticket in California and she replied I have it, hugs good bye with tears flowing and praying the angels will surround her and keep her safe as she lives with such gusto and no fear. I suppose I carry enough for the two of us. Well in my mail i decided to ck out the mail coming in from California it read it was a 211 ticket and now because she ignored it her fee is now 474 OMG Dear Jesus I was shocked how could she have ignored this after I told her if she did not take care of this they could suspend her driving and have a warrant out for her, well it was all true. Joy was nice she was in collections and i had only one choice as a parent i could not reach my daughter by phone as she
says that cell phones are not good for our health so she no longer uses them. So I have to wait on her email reply and that could be days or weeks as she is not always by service. So as I said I had Joy run it on a credit card and said lets hope there is enough on it to cover it as being single parent of grown children it is a Myth that they take care of their own life and bills, I have heard from so many of you at there that you are still helping your children that are grown. Its a different generation as in mine we never ask our parents for help. Thats why I stayed in a marriage for nearly 25 years for security for my children an so I did not have to ask for help. And it was simply he never helped with anything concerning us everyone else not his own. Or I would still be married. Life is one big circle you just constantly get done helping one an another one comes around needing help. And as I have written from the start Jesus Blesses me all the time and you may be saying but you had to do this pay that how is that helping , he did not do this once again we on this earthly life we make our own mistakes and have to be accountable it just sad that we still have to be accountable for our grown children. And he has sent things my way to help pay for these extra cost that arise and out of the Blue. I have a painting that just sold so no I did not get that because it had to take care of the cost of the air unit. And i have a catering and that will help to cover the cost Joy had to put on my credit card. In all its a loss to me what would and could of been a savings or set aside emergency money had to go pay things that I had not planned on. So in all ladies a quiet moment in the bathroom relaxing in the tub with a great book or devotional for the day is what you deserve. Some might say let them learn a lesson don’t pay it, well I hate to tell you it will fall back on you because if i had not paid it and she got pulled over at a regular traffic stop. She would of been arrested right there taken to jail had to make bail which Joy said could be 370 to 600 then go to court pay court cost still have to pay the ticket and have a record. So we do what are hearts tells us we need to do you don’t have to like it and it gets old. But i think of down the road and how much more this will cost if its not cleared now. And yes it would of been great if she had said months ago Momma Its 211 for the ticket can you pay this until I can pay you back. I would have not happily but i would of been out less money and knew it was taken care of. Her father never helps out so it’s all left up to me and yes I won’t lie it’s overwhelming at times. I just want peace an tranquility and Jesus will provide that path one day soon. Through him all things are possible and he continues to Bless me each day. the painting selling a blessing the catering a blessing you have to work for what you receive but he will bless you and give all the Thanks. I never said it was easy its really funny at times to set back and see where we are and what lies ahead. The nice lady Joy taking care of my daughters ticket was laughing she said you are so funny because I left out all the venting I was doing in her ear the whole time. She said I need to go on the road do comedy about all these situations because young mothers like her need to know. How blessed she listened and spoke english so she could understand my venting someone else may have taken it wrong. May you have a blessed day.

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I just recently lost a loved one who had been so ill for over a year, in an out of Hospitals and never could remember anything and had so much pain. He passed last night and all I could think as everyone held on to the empty shell of a man that he was not there he had went on to heaven. And he was in such a better place then all of us and we should rejoice for him even if his loss his painful he is much better off. He went in his sleep to be with our Jesus and the Angels. There is nothing one can say at this time just love the around you and remember how special the one lost was and all the memories. Remember to be thankful for your day and all the Blessings you have come your way, and always ask the Lord Jesus what it is he wants you to do for him. And please keep our family in your prayers today and the next couple of days as we go through the funeral. May you have peace and may you feel Love and give it as well.

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I know you are so depressed or so upset of our economy in the US now and if you are divorced and alone, with children to support it is so much harder. Believe me when I say it will get better you have to hit rock bottom to become humble to understand what Jesus has for you . It is great it is mighty is possible for all who work hard to overcome and work for it, as nothing comes to those who sit and feel sorry for themselves. If i had done that I would be on the streets today without any work no food or housing. But I do have my faith and i do pray and ask Jesus what he wants for me today what blessings any whatever I am open and at his will. I try to help all people of all race and religion for them not for me but because I feel that is what he has left me on this earth to do. I always tell everyone Jesus does not love me more than anyone else and he will bless you but you have to pray and ask him what is his will for you please dear lord whatever you send my way i will be grateful and pray I serve you well. And I promise you will see a change in your life put others before your own needs no matter how low you are someone is much lower and Blessings will surround you i have seen it I am proof of his kindness. So dont be afraid to lift your arms in prayer or get on your knees believe it is real . it will happen have time and faith its not a Jeanne in a bottle that grants wishes its prayer and faith and you have to ask what his will is for you what direction he sends you in. Each day is a knew one for me I never know what blessings will come and somedays they don’t but my faith never dies i have faith because he is working on my path and I also have to work hard to show him I am wothy/ so hold on we are all together in this and I am here for you. Its so hot and sometimes you may want to give up get up fix your self up go out search for work or whatever your needs are remember to as Jesus everyday what is your will i am your child dear father what ever you send my way today in blessings I will thank you. For I am only the vessel that is here you do all the work to make it all happen. You have to work you can’t be lazy things come to those that work for it and ask for your blessings don’t let your blessings pass you by. May you all have a beautiful blessed day.

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I wan to say it has been so long since I have had time to get back on line to talk to all by great special friends. So much has happen parents sick, oldest daughter with two small children husband left them without home food car anything. Here I am alone making it the best I can with the blessings of My Jesus and now another problem arises, and my Daughter who has a degree from Ole Miss seems to be looking for her place in life and puts me on pens an needles on her safety going from state to state. And my sweet son who had so many problems and his Disease well you just think what next. well I have been doing everything to try and help all even friends on the edge of eviction so they can stay in there home another month, I guess I am an easy target to soft hearted. But Jesus wants me to help others and I will continue to until I pass on to the after life. You out there I have no more than others and less them some everyone has something to carry. I went to a beautiful wedding back home last weekend it was so sweet my Daughter was her brides Maid and I saw people I had not seen since my divorce 6 years ago and they were some kind words and some who chose to ignore me thats fine I forgive all. I want so bad to help others so if there is someone out there needing to get a tax break or looking for a foundation to give to I have the best one contact me , you will be so rewarded and feel so good about yourself. Jesus will bless you so much. I have two grandchildren 5 and 3 and they are so beautiful and need all the things in life to have a chance in this world my daughter needs a job we are looking it is hard, as you are all aware and if you have to take care of grown children and single you know what I mean. And then there is the parents to take to doctor appts and constant need of your attention. we wonder how will they all get by if something happens to us. I really dont know so I try to hold on. ANd with the grace of my blessings from Jesus he keeps me going and helping everyone around me. My dear friends remember to take care of you and let me know any of your stories I will be bringing you some very good advice and stories in the next week, I have missed you all and to all of you a I wish all the blessings you can handle and the bad things take them one at a time and you will survive Im still here for you. God Bless until next time soon much love B.

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You know girls I see so much mumbo gumbo about how we are suppose to be in our 50’s and look , act and most all talk about this with a spouse in tow. Well it is hard being out here alone in ones 50’s trying to survive in a whole knew world. If one was to truly believe in the words of Jesus you would know the time on this Earth is nearing to an end. As with all horrific storms and devastation in the world, you would think that our time was nearing. And I do put all my faith in Jesus he has blessed me so much and with that faith I am prepared for his return. With that said girls please take each day as it comes don’t sit and dwell is this our last day or you will drive yourself crazy. I love the fact that when I open my eyes each day that he has seen worth in me to have another day here on earth, and in that said it is up to me to make the best of my day and what happens is totally up to me. We are our own destiny and we make what happens in our lives and true sometimes we get a rock thrown our way and it may set us back. But get up and say thank you Jesus for I know you have a plan and this is just a bump in the road and a blessing is around the corner. You must work for what you get out of life, after being married so long I miss my simple life at times and even my ex and I know its just because that was habit and routine and face it it’s much easier if you are in what you know and feel secure in. I am not I chose to leave and I have had many hurdles along the way and I have prayed and have been so blessed. If I had stayed in my old life you would have never heard my voice, i would of never painted a painting and I would of never known that I could make it on my own with the help of Jesus. You are all special women out there and you have that inside you pull it out ask God to guide you. Never ever think you can’t make it because you can, we all can you have to want it. I have been off the Blog for awhile due to a lot going on in my life and to be honest I want to blog everyday and will try to get back on track. Please remember how important you are and remember to take a little time out for you each day, even if it is just 15 minutes it’s your time. And the 50’s thing well I can assure you I feel better now than when I was in my 20’s my body aches a lot more , I feel age has nothing to do with anything it’s just numbers. You are what is important and how you feel and your take on life being over 40 and divorced. If you are thinking about it and have not yet joined the single women think about it hard and always make sure it is your decision not someone pushing you. Divorce is hard it’s not an easy decision to make, and sometimes it’s so hard we just keep putting it off because it scares us as to where will I be. I am guilty of that and I finally did it but it was hard the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. And I sometimes regret because of my children it made things hard for them with his family. You must know you will be the one everyone blames if you leave so be prepared. And prepared for all inlaws to totally forget you even were ever there. I hold no bad feelings towards anyone I just want my children to be happy and treated normal they did not divorce him I did and somehow some people forget that. I am never alone I have all of you. Remember Blessings girls they are there for the asking take yours today. Bless all of you………

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Bathroom break is something as we as women rarely have to relish and I don’t mean running to the bathroom.

What I am talking about is it’s your day your time to have 30 minutes alone in the bathtub, bring a book,glass of wine and light some candles just to make it a softer calming mood.  And yes leave the phone in the other room tell the kids or family members excuse me but I’ll be back in about an hour or less.  And if you get a good 30 minutes of alone time to just unwind you have made your stress level just come down.  If you would like to listen to some great Miles Davis ooh I do  agree that would put you in another place for just a moment in time put oh how good you will feel.  You are moving constantly trying to do all things for everyone, making a living worry about your daily life  duties as a single mother or if your by yourself it still has the same effects of life getting overwhelming.  ”I can do all things thru him who strengthens me” philippians 4:13  And this is so true with all that comes down on you daily you can remember that because you can do all things thru him and as always I still stand strong on giving Jesus all the thanks for your blessings I say thank you Lord every day even if there is no Blessing had that day I thank him for making it thru the day that is your Blessing.  Share your blessings with others let them hear from you how you have been blessed it will help you.  And remember to take more alone Bathroom time for you , as you deserve it.  I know each day comes with knew struggles and problems that arise please understand I do know and I have been thru all that have been out there, without asking for Gods love and help,blessings have just come my way and when the really bad crashes down that you think you just can’t take another step believe me you can and it will make you stronger from it.  You are special you are important you matter to me and to the Lord Jesus and when all gets to be just too much stop take deep breaths and speak to our father and he will answer you , it may not be what you want right now you will be ok,  he will not forsake you.  I guess I just want to share today with you with take time for you but as always know where your blessings come from and always, always give Jesus the thanks for without him your blessings would not come.  And as I said it has been 6 years as of this month since I have been in my former security when I was married and you will question did I do the right thing or should I just stayed and continued whatever your life was that you could not take.  And I say to you it is normal to question and to feel insecure and maybe regrets, always remember you did make that move and change in your life it had to be so bad or something you needed or you would not have made that big step.  And it was a huge step, but your out here now and no feeling sorry for ourselves just hold strong have faith and watch your life begin to change for the better.  I hope your day is filled with love, happiness and love for you and your time alone relaxing in the tub, remember try to give yourself  at least 30 minutes of alone time to enjoy and I realize this is a hard thing to give to us.  You deserve it .  And if things just get so overwhelming remember where to go with your problems you will find peace.  You go and have a Blessed day.

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Hello and well my parents have been sick and had to leave town to care for them and they do not have internet service so I have been away from you all lately.  You know driving alone in your car gives you time to be thankful and time to stop and think about your life.  And well ya’ll I had to stop and look at myself on the trip there and back as it’s 2hrs of alone time.  And I began thanking Jesus for all the Blessings he has given me through the health of my parents to the miracle of my Bella she is now known to all as the Jesus Baby she belongs to him and lives and sleeps with me.  I just look at her with all glory and amazement that she was at deaths door and all your prayers and my Blessing from Jesus she is walking, barking and to all that never knew she was so ill can’t even tell.  It takes my breath away every time I look at her, and know how sick she was it’s real folks and if you don’t pray or know Jesus let me help you ask me and I will pray with you.  Remember he Loves us all the same and I am not special he will Bless you as well.  I just thank him daily and sit with my mouth wide open with amazement sometimes at how much he does Bless us all.  And as I drove home it grave me time to reflect on my life and everyone around me.  I know my children are my life and they are yours as well and when your alone and thinking about your life and maybe how you could make some things better, remember to not beat yourself up.  You are human and going through life alone is very hard and sometimes it does get overwhelming and sometimes the only alone time you have is when your driving from here to there.  Remember to Love yourself and do something for you for a change, we tend to forget ourselves as we try to carry the heavy load of caring for everyone else, we loose site on ourselves.  Take a nice long bath, go out to eat with a special friend , read a good book or just rest.  I know sometimes I just want to close my eyes and really not think of anything just be.   After having to worry how each day is going to go I think sometimes just that alone time of silence is a Blessing and a bit of peace.  And then life will come find you once again and everything starts all over again so take advantage anytime you get that Moment for You!!  And if there is something that you are wanting in your life Claim it in Jesus Name and it will come maybe not today but it will be yours.  My sisters never forget where your Blessings come from that is the secret always give thanks and Blessings will Flow and continue to come  in your life.  And as I leave you for the day remember Stop take a Moment for You.

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Remember all the things you have to do everyday,work,take care of your family and possibly going back to school on top of all that.  Somewhere along the way we tend to forget our needs and who we are and that You are Special Too.  In between all the care giving and trying just to survive in this world we live in today, and maybe you were  recently unemployed and now you have that extra worry on you besides all the other daily things you have already.

You Are You and in that I say You are Special and mean something and things should  not always be so overwhelming, I do understand that sometimes it’s more than you can take and maybe just taking the easy road out might be better for everyone.  No that’s not an option for us women we stand together and we unite and help each other out and with your love for your Faith you will make it through all things.  Even when it appears the end of the tunnel can’t be found believe me it’s there and you will make it, if you are thankful for all the things the Lord Blesses you with.

And I say with all the Love from within you are all Special and You are all very much individuals with your own talents and wisdom you share with your family daily.  It is hard being on your own in this world and now with the economy in the shape it’s in that’s  just another obstacle to overcome and you are strong you can prevail.

I came with only my children and the Lord Jesus in my heart and with his Blessings I have been able to be here today to show you how Important you all are to him and to your family, and how much you give to us all by being you.  So the next time you have your pitty party and you will remember you can make it and you are Special and You are You and with that said you ask for your Blessings and you give thanks and come back and tell me your special stories of how your Blessings helped you and always remember to give thanks to the Lord for all you have received and for what is coming your way.

Do something for you today, if it’s just 20 minutes alone in the tub listening to your favorite music with a nice glass of wine.  Have your Special time!!!!!

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As I have always told you all this is a day to day process never knowing what may be in the path for the next day or next trial.  We as single Divorced Women work so hard at out Families ,lives and trying to make a living to survive in this world of so many trials.  Well girls as you have noticed I have been off the Blog for a few days due to a family crisis once again, I am not  free of trials or pain.  My Baby Dog Bella has been so sick for over a week now with her pancreas and it has been touch and go I have had to put everything on hold as she needs my constant care 24 hrs a day we go daily for IVs at the vets office she gets loaded with meds and she still is not responding for get the cost which I can’t afford but will do without to pay to try to keep her alive that’s what we do as mothers ,we are the rock for everyone even our beloved pets.  So there was much more about seeking jobs working on you, preparing for your life alone, and taking what you know and have and making it.  We will get into that this week, But due to my crisis at home I ask for your Prayers For Bella a 7yr old Yorkie who looks like a baby fox hair as silky and shiny and black eyes to break your heart.  My baby is in so much pain I have prayed and ask all I know to pray for her recovery but I must be honest she’s touch and go and she is very weak today, I just pray she makes it through the night with your prayers it is possible.  I will be back on track as soon as I handle what you all will or may come across in the future and I will be here to uplift you as well. 

Reaching For The Faith

To believe in all that is in our hearts and holding on to Gods word don’t hold back as I have went through this

overwhelming time, my Faith has kept me strong, and i do cry constantly of the thoughts that she will not  make it I just continue to Reach out for my faith in the Lord Jesus and ask his Blessings to save her or to Bless her so she may wake up and be Bella again without pain, but I have to remember he may have decided that he wants her and I need to prepare myself, Ladies through all things may it be Family, friends or you loving Pet it is all the same constant prayer and Faith N Reaching out to Jesus for your faith is constant and he is always there.  All I can do is give it to the Lord and what ever his will I have to accept and go on, as you must do the same in your lives situations.

May you call out raise your hands give thanks and let the Lord know whatever his will we will have our Faith.

Ladies don’t hesitate to share your trials or ask questions and if I can help I will answer all questions or needs we are sisters of a situation, being we are now free and it may seen hard but you are strong you can make it, And I am here

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